Holy Moments and Kingdom Minded Grieving

Last week I had a chance to be part of one of those holy moments you get to experience from time to time.  Those moments when the veil between heaven and earth seems thinner, when you sense you are part of something bigger than “normal” life.  When you see someone act in a way that can only be explained by the presence of the Holy Spirit, infusing them with spiritual eyes and a grace we can’t muster up on our own.  And by seeing it, you are drawn closer as well.

We launched four squads of World Racers – and therefore four squads of World Race parents.  The parent launch event is one of my favorite things in parent ministry.  We give information, they meet our leadership, we hope they get glimpses into our heart for missions and discipleship and their Racers, we answer their questions, we talk about their Racer’s journey but also their journey.  It’s an amazing time.

We had a unique family there this time.  Jon-Roy and Maria Sloan and their son Sterling.  Their daughter, Anastasia, was scheduled to launch.  She was scheduled to meet her squad in person at training camp in May.  And a week or so before training camp, she died in a car accident. 

Her parents wanted to be at launch.  They wanted to be part of the journey of F squad, her squad.  As the dad spoke to the 210 gathered parents, he said they know that Anastasia’s name is not yet finished advancing the kingdom.  They know she (and everyone else) thought she was going on one journey and instead she went on a different journey.  In her blog she had been telling the Lord to take her deep.  She was so sure that God was going to work in and through her.  The Sloans are equally sure that her impact on the kingdom is not yet done. 

As we gathered to pray over the Sloan family, her younger brother Sterling reached for the microphone, looked out at the crowd and said “Your children [your Racers] are going to be fulfilling Matthew 28:19 – they are going to be making disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.”  It was an emotional moment for those of us hearing that.  But it was a holy moment as well.

I can’t imagine the pain you feel if you lose a child.  But I’m grateful for the people who have modeled it for me in ways that profoundly affect me, that remind me there’s an earthly perspective and a deep earthly grieving but there’s also a heavenly perspective, infused with hope.

Dwight and Peggy Buller are people like that.  I’ve gotten to know them since I’ve been at Adventures.  Their daughter Sarah was killed in a car accident while on a mission trip to South Africa in 2009.  Like the Sloans, they knew their daughter’s impact on the kingdom would continue long past her death on this earth – and it has.  There are scholarships and celebrations and so much more in her name.  They received the news on Palm Sunday and every year on Palm Sunday hold a large community celebration – remembering her, but more importantly lifting up her Lord.

Dwight and Peggy are from Minnesota but they love to hang out with Adventures in Missions and they’ve been at several of our parent events.  They’ve shared their story – with tears at times but also with an abiding grasp of God’s goodness to them.  It’s not either/or.  It’s both – a deep, deep grieving and a God of hope and joy.

The Duffs, although I don’t know them as well, are like that too.  Ryan was part of my daughter’s senior class.  It was a small school – only 35 or so in the senior class.  He died in a car accident in November of their senior year.  I watched the Duffs model for that senior class how you walk through grief.  They invited them into the process – spending time with them, holding the visiting hours at the school in a room full of tributes to Ryan created by the senior class,  inviting them to the smaller graveside service after the packed service at the church.  They’ve stayed in touch with many of them – even after 9 years.  They modeled well how to walk through grief.

Linda Duff presents a scholarship in Ryan’s name every year to a graduating senior that in some way reminds them of Ryan or something he cared about.  She does so with grace and joy.

To the Sloans, the Buller, the Duffs and others I have known less well – I will never say “I understand what you are going through” because I don’t.  But I can say this:  You have modeled for me a kingdom perspective.  You’ve reminded me that our life on this earth is not the whole story.  You’ve talked about grace and forgiveness and hope and joy with the deep integrity that comes from a hard path.

And you’ve brought me into holy moments.