A Full Pantry

Then Abigail made haste and took two hundred loaves and two skins of wine and five sheep already prepared and five seahs of parched grain and a hundred clusters of raisins and two hundred cakes of figs, and laid them on donkeys.  (1 Samuel 25:18)

This is an obscure little verse in the middle of the story of the interaction between David, Nabal and Abigail.  David and his troops are on the run from King Saul and low on supplies. He sends some of his men to ask Nabal for food.  Nabal sends back a rude and insulting reply. And David tells his men to prepare to attack Nabal’s home.

Abigail (Nabal’s wife) gets wind of what is happening, takes the action in the verse above, and sends provisions to David and his men.  She averts the attack and it’s the beginning of the unfolding of an unexpected story.

What catches my eye here is not just how Abigail was used in a mighty way.  It’s that she had those provisions ready to go in a crisis situation.  She was solidly prepared for an unanticipated event. She had reserves to quickly tap into.  

What if this image of a stocked pantry applies in ways other than feeding hundreds of people?  

The things I’ve learned, the things I’ve experienced, the things I’ve chosen to make foundations in my life – all of these provide reserves to draw on.  They are available to bring to a new situation. My pantry is stocked. It’s partly just decades of walking with Jesus. But a pantry doesn’t get filled up without some degree of intentionality. Without taking what is outside the pantry (but available) and moving it into the pantry.  So in addition to the years involved, it’s also, at least in part, an intentional lifestyle of choosing to grow and to learn and to press in deeper. A willingness to seek counsel and wisdom from others.  A willingness to “count it all joy” when I encounter hardships. A willingness to cling tighter during the rough times, to run toward Him instead of away from Him. A willingness to accept correction in a way that creates intimacy instead of distance.

Once again, I am facing a situation where my pantry supplies are game-changers.  Once again I’m part of a club that I would never have chosen, on my own, to be part of.  The exact details of what that is don’t matter. What matters is that I have resources which allow me to face this with confidence and hope and peace.  

So what are some of the things in my pantry?

• An absolute belief that God is trustworthy.  “For we know and rely on the love God has for us.”  It’s my “cling to” verse (1 John 4:16) The Amplified version is even better:  “We have come to know [by personal observation and experience], and have believed [with deep, consistent faith] the love which God has for us.”  I believe this because it has been true in my life, not just because I’m “supposed” to say it. I know for sure that my heart is safe with Him.

• The “peace that passes understanding”.  It is real and available to me. I don’t have to work hard to get there.  It does not mean there are no tears or no grieving. It doesn’t eliminate emotional fluctuations but it provides a solid base from which to deal with them.  And a place to return to so that I can sleep at night.

• A courageous approach to hard things.  The realization that not only can I endure hard things but I can thrive in the midst of them.  They are survivable. And not just in a barely make it kind of way.  Sometimes in the middle of it and sometimes looking back after the immediate pain or trauma or hardship, I see that an abundance was built into that season.  And I can endure far harder things than I would have imagined I could. That knowledge is now rock solid in my life.

• Freedom and joy.  I know at a core level that freedom and joy come on the other side of hard things and they are worth the pain of getting there.

• Healing that is deep, solid and lasting.  The fruit of the excruciatingly hard work I did years ago has carried forward and I do not have to do that hard work all over again.  New situations do not require me to battle the same old tapes or the same old fears.

• A fun sense of amazement.  I’ve reached a point where, for the most part, the old fears and insecurities are no longer able to get a foothold in my life.  I’m amazed and delighted. Not only do I not have to struggle against them or work hard to separate truth from lie, it’s just fun to realize what God has done in my life.

• A relationship with my Father that is pretty free of any sense of entitlement.  When I face tough things, it’s largely because we live in a fallen world. As a daughter of the King I have authority to boldly approach His throne and make my requests known.  And I’m learning to do that more readily. But that is different than feeling I’m entitled to being spared the tough things. “Why me?” has never been a consuming question for me, and I’m grateful for the grace that spares me that temptation.

Full pantries are good things!  “Oh, how abundant is Your goodness, which you have stored up for those who [reverently] fear You.  Which you have prepared for those who take refuge in You.” (Psalm 31:19)