I have realized that the restlessness I referred to in my previous post is gone. The restlessness that nagged at me for years, that ebbed and flowed but never completely went away, and that was a large part of making the decision to come to Georgia – I haven’t felt it since I’ve been here. I don't normally make shifts quickly or easily – so the ease with which I have slipped into life here in Georgia is an unexpected gift.
A year ago, I was still hoping that this move was the "next step" I was supposed to take. How it would work out on a daily basis, or whether it would take care of the restlessness, was still unknown.
I need moments like this – when I realize I'm not in the same place I was before. It's not about moving toward some unattainable perfection or even just "being better." It's a remembering that enriches my relationship with a Father who loves me enough to walk through all of these things with me, who knows who He created me to be and gently moves me more fully into that, a God who says that bringing the Kingdom is an ongoing journey and He needs me fully engaged and prepared and that i don't have to do that on my own.
And in this particular instance, the end result is this: My heart feels at home here.
Even in the day to day shifting of responsibilities that characterizes much of what I do, I don’t find myself wondering about whether there’s a “next step” I’m supposed to take right now. I still expect to be stretched, to have hard times and easier times. I think there are ministries and calls that will grow and unfold in unexpected ways and that will require me to step out in faith. But there's not the restlessness I felt before.
Much of what I do looks “ordinary”. I am not “on the field” or doing “front lines” ministry in the way that most people would define it. I don’t have an abundance of pictures that capture the work I’m doing. I don’t get to hold orphans in my arms on a daily basis or build relationships with those hurting in far corners of the world. In many ways I could be working in any office in any organization.
But I’m not working for just anyone. I am working with Adventures in Missions.
Stay tuned for some of the reasons why my heart feels at home here …
How encouraging, Betty! I just recently had a “i am not where i was” moment, and it really does give me hope for the future, and knowing that i owe it all to Him gives me reason to want to shout His name to everyone who can hear!
You are a big reason of why my parents connected to Adventures in Missions in the first place, and i am delighted to know you are both working with them and following His will for your life.
I am so happy for you, to know that you are no longer restless. What a blessing. Continued blessings to you, sister!
I am with you Betty. It sounds like you have settled into the “ordinary time” and the settling does not allow the restlessness. You aren’t fasting or in penance but in watchful expectation of Christ. There is nothing ordinary in that. It is a rich place to be.
“My heart feels at home here.” So glad to hear that. I am so glad to hear such peace in your life. You are someone I really look up to. You lead the way — thank you!
Hot Dog!
It is wonderful to see the peace and grace on your life. I love it that the Lord has brought you to a place close to us. Your life is a testimony to the faithfulness of God!
I’ve started reading through some of your blogs as I am on my own journey of restlessness. I appreciate your thoughts. I resonate with much of it. I love how “your heart feels at home.” Thanks for your encouragement in my journey.